6:18, +$149.00
NAUTICA;
The first part of the day I went downtown to continue my four game win streak. There really isn’t too much to report regarding specific hand histories. However, I did happen to flop top pair and a flush draw on three different occasions, and each time all my chips were in the middle immediately because I kept getting re-raised. I was the winner two out of three times and that pretty much put me in the black for the day. I just realized that I wrote a whole paragraph and didn’t swear one time. Well, as famous chef Gordon Ramsay likes to say, “fuck me!”
It’s always interesting to see what kind of table dynamics I’m going to run into when I sit at a new table. I felt good about this one because there were a couple of action players present and I rely on them to get paid off at some point during the session. I can’t stand it when I find myself playing with old men regulars who waste a seat playing one hand an hour and holding onto their stacks like it’s their life savings. These are the same nits that bring little coolers containing a couple bologna sandwiches on wheat bread, a banana or apple and a thermos filled with hot coffee. Are you fucking kidding me? What do you think you are doing? camping???
The one action player’s name is Willie and he is a very tan construction worker. This fucker is a regular and plays almost every hand even in raised pots because he can’t ever get up the nerve to fold before seeing a flop. It’s amazing to watch the number of hands this guy enters, and then of course he always seems to catch a piece of the board and decides to stick around a little while longer. Willie is like a fly that keeps swarming around your head while you’re jogging or riding a bike because he just won’t go away. FYI, I have never jogged in my whole life but I have run from cops several times so I can kind of relate. Anyways, he is one of the players that paid me off when I converted a flopped pair and flush draw. It was funny because I was supposed to show my cards first but before I could do anything, he said he had ten high. I stood up out of my seat and responded, “I want to see both cards, I called you”. The funny thing about this statement was the fact that it wasn’t true because I pushed and he called me. I was just pissed off at him for not believing a move I made on him earlier. Anyhow, he finally showed his ace kicker and I tabled my flush. At that point the table told him I was wrong in wanting to see his cards first and he shot back, “take it easy buddy, what are you getting all huffy for?” It was at that point I started chuckling at what a retard I must have looked like and I had to bite my tongue in order to quit smiling. I turned red from embarrassment.
I was planning on staying for a while longer but Matt G. talked me into driving out to Terry’s for the cash game. I never gave it a thought before now because it takes an hour to get there and I didn’t figure a cash game would get going until late because of the tournament structure. I decided to go and cashed out around 8:30pm for a small profit.
5:23, +$439.00
TERRY’S;
So I drive the whole trip to Terry’s without making any major mistakes or wrong turns to speak of…until I pull into the development. Keep in mind that I have only been to the host’s house on one previous occasion which was after a golf outing and I was a little under the influence at that time. Anyways, the street is lined with cars and one driveway in particular is absolutely full. “We are here Matt, don’t they have a nice house. Why is there a lady in the front window on a laptop and some old duded reading a book?”. Matt responds, “That’s the losers lounge” I impressively answer, “Oh ya, you’re right.” I walk through the front door with my twelve pack of
Before I begin hand histories, it must be noted that I cannot be held responsible for inaccurate recollections because you see, I was a little under the weather at this venue and my memory was somehow affected. I’m looking to see a doctor about this medical condition, but until then, bear with me.
I buy in for $160.00 to the $1/$1 cash game, draw a card and realize that of all people in this group who I don’t want on my left, is on my fucking left! I was thinking to myself, what are the odds I can put my seat card back in the deck without anyone realizing it and then redraw? This is absolutely terrible! How the fuck am I supposed to play poker with CraZy, Fucking Psycho Maniac, Caveman on my left??? I’m so done. In fact, I thought of immediately tossing my $1000.00 onto the table, telling everyone good night, and then proceed back to the party across the street.
“You know what, I can’t quit. Fuck Caveman. I’ll just play tight and trap that mother fucker when I get a hand.” In theory, this strategy is beautiful, but in reality, it just ain’t gonna happen, wouldn’t be prudent. Guess what? Almost immediately, he called my $7.00 bet after I looked down at JJ. Mistake number one was not opening for $2000.00 or more. That would have possibly, perhaps, maybe gotten this maniac to fold. Probably not. Anyways, I c-bet $25.00 on a flop of 973 and surprisingly, Caveman calls. I can’t imagine the garbage this guy is staring at. A 6 hits the turn and I made it $40.00 This fucking psycho then pushes on me! “Seat change please!” I fold and Caveman said he turned a straight. I kinda believed him because it would have required two retard cards for him to hit it. 8-5? Lol
Not much later a second table opens and we draw for two players to move. Matt G. is one of them and I took a flying leap into his seat because Caveman was now on my immediate right. “Hi Caveman, I like you much better on my right.”
I also got involved in a hand with Nautica Brian. I opened for $10.00, Brian makes it $35.00, I raise to $100.00, Brian pushes and I insta call with AK. He flopped JJ and they hold. “Fuck me!”
I re-buy for $160.00, look down at AA, grab half my stack without counting and sloppily plop it down in the middle of the table. I thought this would entice customers because everybody knew I was steaming from the hand I just lost. Guess what? My maniac friend pushed on me! I call and my pair held up to his JJ. I just got all my chips back. Whew!
Caveman was not the only maniac at our table. No siree. You guys have got to play with Angie. She is an absolute maniac and loves to push chips around especially when she is drinking. Somebody should tell her not to play cards when she is drinking because she starts to play too loose and spews off chips. Maybe I should tell her. On one particular hand I make it $10.00 with ?? Colin raises to $60.00 and Angie pushes for $162.00! Really? I fold and Colin calls. I think Colin had AK and Angie had 9-2. She took down the pot when the board ran out 92Q4! I could be wrong in recounting this hand but my purpose is to point out how crazy the table was getting as the night went on.
It started getting late and we only had one orbit left to play. I was stuck for approximately $500.00 and was not happy. Nothing was really working for me. I doubled up Brad early on when he flopped a boat, Angie bluffed me off of my flush and Caveman was just out of control. In fact, I almost called the cops on their asses.
Now let me take a quote out of Mailman’s blog and direct you to the hand of the day which turned out to be the last hand of the evening. I get dealt 7-8 on the button and call Diablo's $10.00 raise along with Angie to see a flop of 5c-6h-9h, BINGO! I immediately think to myself that I have to play this hand slow so I can get paid and recoup some of my losses. Angie bets $30.00, Diablo makes it $90.00 and we both call the 3-bet. I can’t really remember what happened after this because of my medical condition but I think Angie checks the turn, Diablo pushes for about $70.00, and I push as well for an additional $260.00 Angie tanks and decides to call a bet of $330.00. To my amazement she tables a heart draw with one card to go. Holy shit, $330.00 with nine outs??? Diablo tables a set, I table my straight, the river is a brick and I take down a $1000.00 pot! Thanks for playing!
Cumulative: +$297.00, 45:68
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